I am well aware of the preconceived notions about fasting because I held them as my own prior to this class. I know that our thwarted American view of food and our dietary obsessed culture causes one to worry about someone who decides to give up food. We wonder if they are anorexic, or we are concerned that it might cause serious health complications, or we worry they might starve. And I'm not judging anyone here because those were beliefs that I held too. However, I have now experienced and changed my opinions towards fasting. Here I am to blog about it! (Which means I survived)
Americans especially are subject to our stomachs. Once he or she starts to growl, we are done, we need food immediately. We bow to every whim our stomach demands. We feed it when it wants, what it wants, and how much it wants. We are completely dependent on the demands of our stomach.
But what if we weren't? The reality of our stomach is that we condition it to feel hungry every time we feed it. Our stomach is so not in control of us, we just need to learn to regain the control of it. We were made to control those desires.
Fasting is a direct disobedience to the demands of of our material body, and it is direct obedience to fueling the spiritual being. Fasting can very easily be misused when other benefits become elevated over the spiritual. The sole purpose of fasting needs to be "abstaining from natural foods for a spiritual purposes." (Foster, 48) In fact, Foster defines fasting as "feasting on the Word of God." Fasting is a way to be reminded that we are sustained not by food, but by scripture. It causes us to crave God and His care for us. When we are neglected something that it is so necessary to our survival, it truly elevates God's goodness when He provides for us in our deficit. It is amazing to realize that I can give up something so crucial and still be upheld by the Word of God alone. For me, that is more than enough reason to try fasting. Of course I want to know and experience the goodness of God!
I also want to clarify that fasting can have physical health benefits as well. I know for myself, I eat and drink so much junk, that I am sure my body appreciates a break from that. Fasting for 2 or 7 days gives the body a chance to empty itself of all the impure toxins and start fresh for when you start to eat again. This is also symbolic, because as we are emptying ourselves of all the nasty, we are refilling with all the goodness of the presence of God. Wow! Now who wouldn't try fasting?
DISCLAIMER: This is again for strictly spiritual purposes. Anything else, and it is no longer fasting. It is still not healthy to starve yourself.
I was always curious about fasting, and was actually grateful for this kind of mandatory chance to try it. The way it was described in Foster's book and in class caused me all the more curiosity and desire to try it. But I knew I had to take baby steps. So I decided that I would start at 7 pm Monday night until 7 pm Tuesday night. I figured I could try this once a week and eventually extend it a couple of days until I could do a whole week. I did not give up my coffee on Tuesday morning even though that breaks the rule of a fast. That is my confession for the week.
But other than that, I followed through on my fast. It was such a challenge to avoid the candy in the candy dish, the brownies on the stove, and the snacks in my cupboard. But every time I thought of these temptations, I prayed and took a gulp of water. I used the time that I would normally be in lunch to read my Bible. I read different sections, so I had a well-balanced meal of scripture. What I found, is that I never really felt hungry. I was never overwhelmed with my need to eat something. Looking back, I know that God was providing for me.
Don't get me wrong, I was so grateful to be able to eat dinner on Tuesday night. Eating and snacking is still very important to me, but I did learn that it does not have to control me. Fasting is definitely something I will try again in the near future. I am hoping that it continues to have better and better results and it draws me closer and closer to God. I'm telling you, it sounds scary and radical. I am well aware of that. But the benefits and the results truly make it all okay.
Thank you for reading today!
Many blessings,
Alyssa
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Practicing the Presence of God
The Spiritual Discipline of Prayer
"Of all the spiritual disciplines, prayer is the most central because it ushers us into perpetual communion with the Father."
"To pray is to change. Prayer is the central avenue God uses to transform us. If we are unwilling to change, we will abandon prayer as a noticeable characteristic of our lives."
"Of all the spiritual disciplines, prayer is the most central because it ushers us into perpetual communion with the Father."
"To pray is to change. Prayer is the central avenue God uses to transform us. If we are unwilling to change, we will abandon prayer as a noticeable characteristic of our lives."
- Richard Foster, 33
Prayer is probably one of two or three different practices that Christians deem absolutely necessary to the Christian walk. I bet anyone who reads this blog will agree with that. The problem is, there are several different ways to pray. There is corporate prayer that we bow our heads to in church. There is prayer that we have in small groups where we each pray for a request. There is prayer that we pray around the dinner table to bless our food. And there is silent, personal prayer. And if you are anything like me, the first three are easy. It is the last one that is the challenge.
In my life, I often utter a spontaneous prayer when I sense something to pray for. In that sense, I do have a healthy personal prayer life. As I go throughout the day I am constantly lifting up burdens, praising God, and just talking to my Creator. I truly talk to God as if He walks beside me everywhere I go. And that is because I believe that He does. Prayer is another discipline that practices the presence of God. In the book we are reading for this class, Foster raises the question of our theology. Does our prayer life reflect that we believe God is always present? Do we pose requests to God as if we believe He can do anything? Do we talk to God like He can hear us? Do we wait because we believe He responds to us? Our prayer life should reflect our beliefs in a God who is omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent. All knowing, all powerful, and always there. If we are talking to God that way, He will respond. If we pray with the expectancy that our prayers will change things because of Who we are praying to, things will change. Prayer is God letting us participate in the course of history.
In that sense, my personal prayer life isn't that healthy. I often talk to God as I am focused on something else. I don't often carve out time to focus on praying to God and inviting His presence into that time. I believe He is always there, but I don't always give that my full attention. So for the practice of discipline this week, I decided to change that. I decided that I would dedicate time twice this week to intercessory prayer. I would pray and only pray with the expectancy that God would respond to my requests. However, it is important in regards to my theology to first pray that my will would align with God's. If I am going to ask God for things, they need to be things that He has already ordained. I can want my requests to be answered with my whole will, but it won't matter if my will is not God's. So I will first life my will and my desires up to God. Guidance before intercession.
There are several things on this campus that need to be prayed for. Two of my very closest friends are having major health crisis, we had a professor in the hospital, student's family members are passing away tragically, we are undergoing staff changes, and several people are feeling the effects of spiritual warfare. I decided to put all of that into my intercessory prayer. And I did. I prayed expectantly twice this week to ask God to heal all of that brokenness. I used the model from Hannah in 1 Samuel 2. She wholeheartedly poured out her requests to the Lord, and they were effective. At this point I am not capable of saying if any of it was "successful." But I do not think that was the point. I do know that I was refreshed, and I do believe prayer has the power to change things. With that combination, I know God was at work in this discipline. Prayer is a pillar of our relationship to God for a reason. It works, and it is our mandate.
So I encourage you to take this one to heart. This one you can and should try at home.
Thank you for reading :)
Many blessings,
Alyssa
Spiritual Autobiography- Final
The Spiritual Discipline of Sharing my Story
For those of you who are just now tuning in, I am in the process of telling my spiritual autobiography in four installments. This is the last one. If you would like to read about my life from the beginning, come back to this one and scroll down first. I hope you enjoy whatever you decide to read :)
I have told the story up until my college years so far. Overall, the past twoish years can be summed up pretty easily: ministry and learning. Up until this point I had a lot of significant relationships impact my spiritual journey and push me towards faith. I then had a lot of awesome trips guide me towards understanding my role as a Christian better. But now, God has used me a leader for His glory. I have taken that next step in my faith and have continued to fall more in love with my Creator.
I attend a Bible college, where I am getting a major in Bible and Theology. This means that I am learning a lot about the person of God and it's implications for my relationship to Him. I am learning doctrine, theology, biblical interpretation and a bunch of other cool knowledge that a lot of Christians deem pointless. However, I am an intellectual, and knowing those things are actually helping me grow deeper in faith. I now have the capability of explaining things I otherwise wouldn't be able to articulate. I feel like it has a brand new impact on the ministry I am called to pursue.
I have even had the privilege of serving in a couple of different leadership roles during my college career. I have worked at a Christian camp as a youth leader for kids and middle schoolers for two summers. That was a fantastic way for me to implement everything that I learned in school. I could feel God using me and I saw Him at work every single day. I grew because I helping other kids grow. I have also been able to serve my peers here at the college. I really thank God for allowing me to see Him in growth in my peers and in myself. I also thank Him for creating me to be a person who is gifted for these roles. I truly love who God has made me to be. In these years I have learned about God, experienced God, and have fallen more in love with Him.
In reality, my entire life has been building up for these college years. I was taking baby steps towards knowing God better. I was blessed in never really having a period of doubt or falling away. I was also blessed by those I was and am surrounded by and their impact on my story. I was blessed on several trips. And I am blessed by the college I attend. All in all, I am incredibly fortunate. At this stage in my life I never cease to turn to God and thank Him for those fortunes. My story is the way it is because of His hand, and I am thrilled to be able to tell it if it gives Him even an ounce of glory. Praise God.
So thank you for reading. It was long and daunting I know, but thank you for the attention. It is appreciated!
Many, many blessings,
Alyssa
For those of you who are just now tuning in, I am in the process of telling my spiritual autobiography in four installments. This is the last one. If you would like to read about my life from the beginning, come back to this one and scroll down first. I hope you enjoy whatever you decide to read :)
I have told the story up until my college years so far. Overall, the past twoish years can be summed up pretty easily: ministry and learning. Up until this point I had a lot of significant relationships impact my spiritual journey and push me towards faith. I then had a lot of awesome trips guide me towards understanding my role as a Christian better. But now, God has used me a leader for His glory. I have taken that next step in my faith and have continued to fall more in love with my Creator.
I attend a Bible college, where I am getting a major in Bible and Theology. This means that I am learning a lot about the person of God and it's implications for my relationship to Him. I am learning doctrine, theology, biblical interpretation and a bunch of other cool knowledge that a lot of Christians deem pointless. However, I am an intellectual, and knowing those things are actually helping me grow deeper in faith. I now have the capability of explaining things I otherwise wouldn't be able to articulate. I feel like it has a brand new impact on the ministry I am called to pursue.
I have even had the privilege of serving in a couple of different leadership roles during my college career. I have worked at a Christian camp as a youth leader for kids and middle schoolers for two summers. That was a fantastic way for me to implement everything that I learned in school. I could feel God using me and I saw Him at work every single day. I grew because I helping other kids grow. I have also been able to serve my peers here at the college. I really thank God for allowing me to see Him in growth in my peers and in myself. I also thank Him for creating me to be a person who is gifted for these roles. I truly love who God has made me to be. In these years I have learned about God, experienced God, and have fallen more in love with Him.
In reality, my entire life has been building up for these college years. I was taking baby steps towards knowing God better. I was blessed in never really having a period of doubt or falling away. I was also blessed by those I was and am surrounded by and their impact on my story. I was blessed on several trips. And I am blessed by the college I attend. All in all, I am incredibly fortunate. At this stage in my life I never cease to turn to God and thank Him for those fortunes. My story is the way it is because of His hand, and I am thrilled to be able to tell it if it gives Him even an ounce of glory. Praise God.
So thank you for reading. It was long and daunting I know, but thank you for the attention. It is appreciated!
Many, many blessings,
Alyssa
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Spiritual Autobiography Part III
The Spiritual Discipline of Sharing my Story
Following middle school, was obviously high school. The theme of this phase of my life still very much revolves around relationships, as well as an added element. I went on three mission trips in those four years that seemed to have lasting implications. This adds the theme of meaningful trips to my story.
My freshman year was still rocky because I was testing the waters with all of the older students I had never met before. I got involved in theatre, and found myself a part of the theatre clique. I still had my two best friends by my side, and together we watched some of other friends experiment with bad choices. We continued to be passionate about church, and stuck with those convictions. That did not mean we stranger to mistakes. We learned a lot about how not to be stupid that first year and it really set the rest of the four years in motion. We got through, and eventually it became time to go on our first mission trip.There was a particular group of incoming senior girls who took myself and one other friend under their wings. Which is amazing considering how much younger we were and the fact that it was high school. For the entire rest of my sophomore year, we hung out with that group exclusively. They were really good for me. They were good role models, they helped me mature faster, and they were safe. They introduced me to high school and taught me that it was okay to be against the grain. I also started to develop some crushes on older boys, which was actually good for me. I learned a lot about using relationships to offer glory to God. However, the only problem with this particular friend group is the fact that they were graduating. They were a blessing for this short portion of my life, but I still had a lot more independence to gain.
After that second year in high school, we went on a second trip to Ecuador. Of all the events in my life, this was the highlight. This was a brand new experience for several reasons. First of all, it was a cross-cultural experience which was very enlightening for a Dutch girl like myself. Second, people are totally on fire for the Holy Spirit in Ecuador and that became incredibly contagious. And third, God was completely the center of that trip. We went without a detailed itinerary, but had prepared a sort of short church service. Some people were in a drama, some people were prepared to lead worship, and some were prepared to give a testimony. We ended up doing that service almost five times a day to various audiences. God was leading us to those groups and we saw a huge number of people turning to Christ each day. Our group was quite large, and there are several things that could go wrong in a group of high schoolers that size in a foreign country. However, our group began the trip pushing all that stuff aside on the very first night. During that first night's worship, the Holy Spirit led some people unleash some pretty heavy confession. It ended up being a very raw time of each of us laying what we had on the table. Anything that would have held the group back was exposed during that time. Our group bonded and was united under one vision, following the prompting of the Holy Spirit. The reaction in my heart to these experiences was unbelievable. I was encountering God in ways I had never imagined, and it changed me. I was finally beginning to understand my call as a Christian. I realized it went much deeper than being saved from sins and loving God. It was about sharing the gospel so that other people could enjoy this love that I loved. This was truly the biggest point of growth in my Christian walk.
My friends and I came back to our junior year in high school without our older friends. But we had a new found passion of evangelism and became tighter than we were before. These were my girls and I loved growing close to God while growing close to them. I also got to know my future husband during that trip to Ecuador. He joined our youth group for that trip, and we developed a friendship. Through God's prompting, that friendship developed into a relationship. We fought it, since he was leaving for Michigan Tech that fall. Neither of us wanted that difficult of a relationship. But God told us otherwise. A week before he left for school, we made it official (and no I do not mean on facebook). My girlfriends were incredibly supportive of this decision, and were there for me every time it got hard. However, their support and the difficulty of that relationship only fueled my charisma for God that year. And it was the best year of my high school career. It also led up to a summer of an even more life changing trip.
We went on a trip to Toronto, Canada to learn about life in poverty the big city. This was also a brand new experience for me because where I come from is not a big city. It is also not near the point of being impoverished. So this chance to see life on the streets first hand was pretty eye opening. We practiced spending only a dollar a day on food, slept overnight in a park, and walked miles upon miles to see how gruesome a life minus comfort can be. This trip introduced me to my passion for social justice. I took one more step in my relationship with Jesus. I learned that there is more than believing and sharing the gospel, it is also about service. I saw the need for Christians rise up and help these people who could not help themselves. That is when I decided that I would go into social work. It was during this summer that my entire future up to this point was decided. And that helped me persevere through the last year of high school.
That last year was a challenge for me. As we got older, peer pressure became more and more attractive and I began loosing friends. They became interested in parties, boys and new friends. I choose not to. I became a bit of a workaholic because I no longer had things to do on the weekends. However, I was really able to draw close to God in those times of loneliness. We had good chats where He really helped me understand my future. I got a job at a Christian camp that summer, and was very ready to move on from high school into the life that God had planned ahead.
This time characterized my biggest period of growth. From here on out I was ready to serve God as fully converted Christian. And that leads us right into my adolescent years.
Thank you for reading.
Blessings,
Alyssa
Following middle school, was obviously high school. The theme of this phase of my life still very much revolves around relationships, as well as an added element. I went on three mission trips in those four years that seemed to have lasting implications. This adds the theme of meaningful trips to my story.
My freshman year was still rocky because I was testing the waters with all of the older students I had never met before. I got involved in theatre, and found myself a part of the theatre clique. I still had my two best friends by my side, and together we watched some of other friends experiment with bad choices. We continued to be passionate about church, and stuck with those convictions. That did not mean we stranger to mistakes. We learned a lot about how not to be stupid that first year and it really set the rest of the four years in motion. We got through, and eventually it became time to go on our first mission trip.There was a particular group of incoming senior girls who took myself and one other friend under their wings. Which is amazing considering how much younger we were and the fact that it was high school. For the entire rest of my sophomore year, we hung out with that group exclusively. They were really good for me. They were good role models, they helped me mature faster, and they were safe. They introduced me to high school and taught me that it was okay to be against the grain. I also started to develop some crushes on older boys, which was actually good for me. I learned a lot about using relationships to offer glory to God. However, the only problem with this particular friend group is the fact that they were graduating. They were a blessing for this short portion of my life, but I still had a lot more independence to gain.
After that second year in high school, we went on a second trip to Ecuador. Of all the events in my life, this was the highlight. This was a brand new experience for several reasons. First of all, it was a cross-cultural experience which was very enlightening for a Dutch girl like myself. Second, people are totally on fire for the Holy Spirit in Ecuador and that became incredibly contagious. And third, God was completely the center of that trip. We went without a detailed itinerary, but had prepared a sort of short church service. Some people were in a drama, some people were prepared to lead worship, and some were prepared to give a testimony. We ended up doing that service almost five times a day to various audiences. God was leading us to those groups and we saw a huge number of people turning to Christ each day. Our group was quite large, and there are several things that could go wrong in a group of high schoolers that size in a foreign country. However, our group began the trip pushing all that stuff aside on the very first night. During that first night's worship, the Holy Spirit led some people unleash some pretty heavy confession. It ended up being a very raw time of each of us laying what we had on the table. Anything that would have held the group back was exposed during that time. Our group bonded and was united under one vision, following the prompting of the Holy Spirit. The reaction in my heart to these experiences was unbelievable. I was encountering God in ways I had never imagined, and it changed me. I was finally beginning to understand my call as a Christian. I realized it went much deeper than being saved from sins and loving God. It was about sharing the gospel so that other people could enjoy this love that I loved. This was truly the biggest point of growth in my Christian walk.
My friends and I came back to our junior year in high school without our older friends. But we had a new found passion of evangelism and became tighter than we were before. These were my girls and I loved growing close to God while growing close to them. I also got to know my future husband during that trip to Ecuador. He joined our youth group for that trip, and we developed a friendship. Through God's prompting, that friendship developed into a relationship. We fought it, since he was leaving for Michigan Tech that fall. Neither of us wanted that difficult of a relationship. But God told us otherwise. A week before he left for school, we made it official (and no I do not mean on facebook). My girlfriends were incredibly supportive of this decision, and were there for me every time it got hard. However, their support and the difficulty of that relationship only fueled my charisma for God that year. And it was the best year of my high school career. It also led up to a summer of an even more life changing trip.
We went on a trip to Toronto, Canada to learn about life in poverty the big city. This was also a brand new experience for me because where I come from is not a big city. It is also not near the point of being impoverished. So this chance to see life on the streets first hand was pretty eye opening. We practiced spending only a dollar a day on food, slept overnight in a park, and walked miles upon miles to see how gruesome a life minus comfort can be. This trip introduced me to my passion for social justice. I took one more step in my relationship with Jesus. I learned that there is more than believing and sharing the gospel, it is also about service. I saw the need for Christians rise up and help these people who could not help themselves. That is when I decided that I would go into social work. It was during this summer that my entire future up to this point was decided. And that helped me persevere through the last year of high school.
That last year was a challenge for me. As we got older, peer pressure became more and more attractive and I began loosing friends. They became interested in parties, boys and new friends. I choose not to. I became a bit of a workaholic because I no longer had things to do on the weekends. However, I was really able to draw close to God in those times of loneliness. We had good chats where He really helped me understand my future. I got a job at a Christian camp that summer, and was very ready to move on from high school into the life that God had planned ahead.
This time characterized my biggest period of growth. From here on out I was ready to serve God as fully converted Christian. And that leads us right into my adolescent years.
Thank you for reading.
Blessings,
Alyssa
Monday, October 22, 2012
Spiritual Autobiography Part II
The Spiritual Discipline of Sharing my Story
The most eventful years of my life were those in middle school. Middle school is traumatic for all teens, but I had extra forces that effected me. Sixth grade was my first year attending youth group, which I am sure was not my choice, but an expectation. At school, I had two best friends and we were the popular kids. I did not let them know that I went to youth group. I met another friend at youth group and I loved her. I really had two distinct lives and had no trouble not incorporating God into who I was at school. Eventually and by the grace of God, those two friend groups clashed. I brought one popular friend to youth group, she met my youth group friend and we became a new friend group rooted in our love for church. We later discovered we even had similar interests in choir and theater. Pretty soon, we were inseparable and I found my whole life making sense. And this was important because of what happened in a third triangle in the pie of my life.
Between sixth and eighth grade, my family underwent a major change. We found out about unfaithfulness in the marriage and soon my parents were divorced. It started out with an extended business trip to Florida, then my Dad moving out, then discovery of the affair, and then the divorce. At this point, I was pissed at everyone and everything. I refused to see my Dad and I know I caused gray hairs for my Mom. The tension in my home was great, and looking back I am sure I was part of the problem. Never mind that though, as an eighth grader, I was the center of my world. So I was going to be pissed. I turned to my friends every time. I lived at their houses as much as I could, I called them every night, and they became my family. I see God at work in this period of my life, because their style of helping me cope was to direct me to God. If they were not church-goers like myself, I do not think I would be in this position today. I know God used our relationship to help me heal in a healthy way, and I am eternally grateful for that.
Usually, that is the bulk of my testimony. I tell that story and emphasize God's goodness and faithfulness. I share that I never really actively pursued God, but I know in hindsight that He held my hand throughout that whole experience. I usually share that I knew my salvation was secured, and my relationship with God grew from there. Which is entirely true. Unfortunately though, that was not the end of my salvation story. I would say that that it is my conversion, because God revealed Himself to me and I made the choice to cling to Him and find Him for comfort rather than my own sinful nature. This is also the time when I made Profession of Faith in church. But there is far more that happened after that that helped me learn about who God is and how I am supposed to live the Christian life. I still have to fall head over heels in love with God... And that is what makes this story different from a testimony. This is the far expanded version. So, keep persevering readers, there is a lot more spiritual maturing that we need to cover.
But that is all for today.
Blessings,
Alyssa
The most eventful years of my life were those in middle school. Middle school is traumatic for all teens, but I had extra forces that effected me. Sixth grade was my first year attending youth group, which I am sure was not my choice, but an expectation. At school, I had two best friends and we were the popular kids. I did not let them know that I went to youth group. I met another friend at youth group and I loved her. I really had two distinct lives and had no trouble not incorporating God into who I was at school. Eventually and by the grace of God, those two friend groups clashed. I brought one popular friend to youth group, she met my youth group friend and we became a new friend group rooted in our love for church. We later discovered we even had similar interests in choir and theater. Pretty soon, we were inseparable and I found my whole life making sense. And this was important because of what happened in a third triangle in the pie of my life.
Between sixth and eighth grade, my family underwent a major change. We found out about unfaithfulness in the marriage and soon my parents were divorced. It started out with an extended business trip to Florida, then my Dad moving out, then discovery of the affair, and then the divorce. At this point, I was pissed at everyone and everything. I refused to see my Dad and I know I caused gray hairs for my Mom. The tension in my home was great, and looking back I am sure I was part of the problem. Never mind that though, as an eighth grader, I was the center of my world. So I was going to be pissed. I turned to my friends every time. I lived at their houses as much as I could, I called them every night, and they became my family. I see God at work in this period of my life, because their style of helping me cope was to direct me to God. If they were not church-goers like myself, I do not think I would be in this position today. I know God used our relationship to help me heal in a healthy way, and I am eternally grateful for that.
Usually, that is the bulk of my testimony. I tell that story and emphasize God's goodness and faithfulness. I share that I never really actively pursued God, but I know in hindsight that He held my hand throughout that whole experience. I usually share that I knew my salvation was secured, and my relationship with God grew from there. Which is entirely true. Unfortunately though, that was not the end of my salvation story. I would say that that it is my conversion, because God revealed Himself to me and I made the choice to cling to Him and find Him for comfort rather than my own sinful nature. This is also the time when I made Profession of Faith in church. But there is far more that happened after that that helped me learn about who God is and how I am supposed to live the Christian life. I still have to fall head over heels in love with God... And that is what makes this story different from a testimony. This is the far expanded version. So, keep persevering readers, there is a lot more spiritual maturing that we need to cover.
But that is all for today.
Blessings,
Alyssa
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Spiritual Autobiography
The Spiritual Discipline of Sharing my Story
A part of the Christian walk is spurring one another on towards greater glory. One way of doing that that has been very powerful for me is sharing my story and hearing other's stories. As part of the assignment for the class, we have to craft our own spiritual autobiographies. This is a comprehensive look at our lives and where God has worked. This more in depth than just a testimony because it covers more than just the conversion story or one time when we encountered God. We are to share this story with our SpiF group members. We are also then to post a semi-abbreviated version on our blogs. I am afraid my won't be all that abbreviated because I tend to be wordy. So, I will be posting my story in 3-4 installments through out the week that the assignment is due. That way you only have to read a shortish section at a time. (I apologize that this might take up your entire day) The first installment is this introduction and the experiences of childhood. The second installment is my adolescent years. These years are a tremendous portion of my story and might turn into two installments; middle and high school. Then the third or fourth installment will be my young adult years, or the current potion of my journey. You can be looking for the rest of these throughout the week :)
Thank you everyone!
I grew up in a very Christian home. Both of my parents were raised in religious backgrounds and had an entire support system of faith helping them raise me. It seems to me that faith has been a part of our family for as far back as I can look. I was baptized as an infant and was promised to be raised in a Christian environment. And that I was. My parents parented my two brothers and I with a program called Growing Kids God's Way. My parents would teach those classes to parents and used us kids as behavioral examples. I am sure that the program had good biblical values, but to us kids it seemed like we were being stifled. I remember always feeling like I had the strictest parents in the whole school. However, in hindsight I know it paid off. We went to a public school, and I know that my parents had to make an extra effort to incorporate Christ into our lives. We were very much raised Christians, even though that was not the education we were getting in school. I being pushed to believing in the Bible from all angles. We were incredibly committed to church, and I was a dedicated Sunday School attender. Our extended families were also passionate about including spirituality into our family. My family is really close, and at family gatherings we would do devotions, crucifiction themed Easter egg hunts, and birth narrative plays. There was no way that I did not know about Jesus growing up. Because I went to a public elementary school, I realize now that not very many of my friends were Christians. I was too young to notice or be effected by it, but I know now that I have to give God credit for guiding me through those friendships with no hiccups.
Probably the most significant experience of my childhood led me to another very significant relationship. We got into a car accident when I was in second grade which left me with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and severe sleep disturbance. This was a troubling time in my life, but gratefully God put my second grade teacher there to pour into me. She went the extra mile to help me succeed that year. The combination of counseling and my teacher got me through that traumatic period and pushed me further towards my spiritual maturity. It was just another relationship God blessed me with.
For these semi-uneventful years, I have to thank God for being present even though I hardly knew it. I was a Bible-believing child, but kept God at a distance. I never had a close encounter with Him, but I do know that He was keeping me safe. He provided people to pour into me, and looking back I owe them everything for the foundation that stood firm for the rest of my life.
Until next time,
Alyssa
A part of the Christian walk is spurring one another on towards greater glory. One way of doing that that has been very powerful for me is sharing my story and hearing other's stories. As part of the assignment for the class, we have to craft our own spiritual autobiographies. This is a comprehensive look at our lives and where God has worked. This more in depth than just a testimony because it covers more than just the conversion story or one time when we encountered God. We are to share this story with our SpiF group members. We are also then to post a semi-abbreviated version on our blogs. I am afraid my won't be all that abbreviated because I tend to be wordy. So, I will be posting my story in 3-4 installments through out the week that the assignment is due. That way you only have to read a shortish section at a time. (I apologize that this might take up your entire day) The first installment is this introduction and the experiences of childhood. The second installment is my adolescent years. These years are a tremendous portion of my story and might turn into two installments; middle and high school. Then the third or fourth installment will be my young adult years, or the current potion of my journey. You can be looking for the rest of these throughout the week :)
Thank you everyone!
I grew up in a very Christian home. Both of my parents were raised in religious backgrounds and had an entire support system of faith helping them raise me. It seems to me that faith has been a part of our family for as far back as I can look. I was baptized as an infant and was promised to be raised in a Christian environment. And that I was. My parents parented my two brothers and I with a program called Growing Kids God's Way. My parents would teach those classes to parents and used us kids as behavioral examples. I am sure that the program had good biblical values, but to us kids it seemed like we were being stifled. I remember always feeling like I had the strictest parents in the whole school. However, in hindsight I know it paid off. We went to a public school, and I know that my parents had to make an extra effort to incorporate Christ into our lives. We were very much raised Christians, even though that was not the education we were getting in school. I being pushed to believing in the Bible from all angles. We were incredibly committed to church, and I was a dedicated Sunday School attender. Our extended families were also passionate about including spirituality into our family. My family is really close, and at family gatherings we would do devotions, crucifiction themed Easter egg hunts, and birth narrative plays. There was no way that I did not know about Jesus growing up. Because I went to a public elementary school, I realize now that not very many of my friends were Christians. I was too young to notice or be effected by it, but I know now that I have to give God credit for guiding me through those friendships with no hiccups.
Probably the most significant experience of my childhood led me to another very significant relationship. We got into a car accident when I was in second grade which left me with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and severe sleep disturbance. This was a troubling time in my life, but gratefully God put my second grade teacher there to pour into me. She went the extra mile to help me succeed that year. The combination of counseling and my teacher got me through that traumatic period and pushed me further towards my spiritual maturity. It was just another relationship God blessed me with.
For these semi-uneventful years, I have to thank God for being present even though I hardly knew it. I was a Bible-believing child, but kept God at a distance. I never had a close encounter with Him, but I do know that He was keeping me safe. He provided people to pour into me, and looking back I owe them everything for the foundation that stood firm for the rest of my life.
Until next time,
Alyssa
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Meditation
The Spiritual Discipline of Meditation
Meditation is a way to practice being in the presence of God. It is not at all the only way to be able to hear God, but it is a way to step back slightly and refocus on God and what He has placed before us. It's like our vision. When we focus in one object in our line of vision, our entire periphery gets blurry. That is like meditating. We focus in our God and all the sudden, everything else fades out. The practice of meditation is like taking a break from culture and it's normalcy, and realizing that all the sudden our entire perspective changes. Meditation can be as simple as leaving all the technology in your room, grabbing the Bible, and heading out to a bench outside. It looks different for all of us, but in general it is a quiet time that is dedicated fully to God while forsaking the things that typically distract us. This break from culture causes a sort of shift, and now we can see God more clearly.We are focused on Him. Meditation is a brief break in the process of life that allows us to continue on in a way that is wholly focused on God.
One thing that I love about meditation is how it brings to light my assumptions about God. I believe in an omnipresent God, who is there all the time. Meditation often gets this rap for being a summoning of a spirit or like a chanting that calls the gods to us, and sitting with them for a time. But that is not true of Christians. I don't have to beg God to meet me when I'm ready to meditate. I don't have to worry that God is not available when I finally have time to meditate. I don't have to hope that God will show up. Because He is present all the time, everywhere. I just have to go meet Him. I have to show up. God has to beg me. I have to carve out time. My belief in this transcendent God only encourages me to meditate all the more. It is how I drawer closer to Him. He wants desperately to speak to us and have our attention. Meditation is an obedient act showing Him that we are listening. It proves that we also want to be in presence. He, and only He, has our undivided attention.
I thought that this sounded beautiful, and I was geeked to try it. I was particularly attracted to the idea of using nature as a way to be in the presence of God. Another assumption I have as a Reformed Christian, is that creation glorifies God. I am wholly able to find God's beauty in the created Earth. So, I decided that because it is fall and this campus is gorgeous in fall, I was going to meditate in the woods. I went out one morning this week at some ungodly hour, and planned to read parts of Psalm 119. I read, walked, listened, and observed. It was a really reverent time, but nothing shattering. I was hoping maybe God would reveal tremendous answers about my future, but that is not how God spoke. I do believe God was whispering to me through the wind in the leaves. Was it a revelation? No. Was it Him promising He was near? Yes. And that is all I needed. That experience has encouraged me to continue practicing meditation. I think I will try it several different ways, several different times. I believe that eventually, it will become a norm for me. And as a God-loving woman, I clearly desire that a norm of my life is being in God's presence. This discipline has taught me the importance of being obedient to God's omnipresence. It also taught me not to discount one of the practices that doesn't rock my world right away. Things don't always need to go as I have planned...
Nonetheless, meditation is an important discipline in our walk with Christ. It is key to keeping Him at the center of our time on earth. A part of celebrating our salvation, is being with the One who made it possible for us. Of course being saved makes me want to celebrate! And of course I want to do it with the One who loves me enough to make it possible! In the long run, it is going to help me continue to glorify Him. I don't get to do anything without Him, so I had better start learning to sense His presence. Wow. Praise God for that.
Blessings,
Alyssa
Blessed are those who keep his statutes and seek him with all their heart—
3
they do no wrong, but follow his ways.
Psalm 119:2-3
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Confession
There were a couple of things that hindered me from appreciating confession at the beginning of this class assignment. As a modern day Protestant believer, my idea of what confession is is tainted by the Catholic practice of regular confession. I cannot hear about confession without picturing a Priest behind a wall listening to my anonymous babble. I also have this picture of certain people in my life who have spilled their guts in the wrong company at the wrong time. I have this gut feeling that confession leads to me knowing too much about a person. It is just too personal. I feel responsible for all of their "stuff," and would rather just carry on minding my own business. Needless to say, my ideas about confession were pretty negative at the start of this week.
However, what I realize now, is that I am just a product of a generation that prefers to keep things easy by keeping things to ourselves. There are a million things that culture has trained me to do in secret. There are another thousand things that are deemed "unfit to discuss" in and out side the Church. I have learned that it's okay to leave some things unsaid. It's okay to repent of our sins, but leave it just between us and God. It's okay to never admit we made a mistake. It is okay, because Jesus died for our sins and all is forgiven. There are so many things that I was taught in my own Bible-believing church about the forgiveness of sins and how to repent. The only problem is, most of them were a lie.
Confession is an important component of the Christian life. The truth is, the power of Jesus on the cross and the resurrection should lead us to disgust of our own sin. We should be entirely striving to live a cleansed life because we are only made alive by Jesus' saving work. A natural result of our salvation should be a turning away from a sinful life into a life that reflects that of Jesus. We need to be appreciative and grateful for the chance at being a part of God's kingdom, guilt-free. But how am I going to do that when I am so comfortable with hiding sin and pretending it isn't there? The reality here is that our American Church has lost the communal piece that fits into our sanctification. If I know I am a sinner, which I am, then I should be confessing that before God. And I do. But I also need to be letting people in on what is going on inside of my heart. A thriving Christian community is one that accepts, supports, and encourages. God created us to live in community with one another, in order that we utilize each other when human nature takes control. God calls us to confess our sins with one another so that we can heal and grow. There is transformitive power in admitting sin and faults to another person and hear them utter the words, "Jesus forgives you." Have you ever actually heard someone speak that Truth to you? I haven't, but imagine how empowering that would feel. God calls us to do that for each other. We can receive confession and forgive it in Jesus' name (Foster, 147). Confession is the road that is going to lead to healing. And healing, broken sinners is the sign of a healthy Christian community that understands the true power of Jesus dying for our sins.
Some things that I am going to take away from this discipline have a lot to do with this Living and Learning community I am a part of (See blog post one). First, I will be sure to offer forgiveness in Jesus' name to whoever tells me anything. I think that is something that carries a lot of meaning and can provide a lot of relief for someone who just wants to get something off their chest. I also want to cultivate an atmosphere of Confession among the nine of in this Community. We are in the perfect position to practice what it means to rely on brothers and sisters when we just cannot overcome a temptation. This will be practice for me to carry on throughout my whole life after I give it a try this week. Obviously, I am on a journey to what mature, viable confession looks like, but it is definitely something I am now more willing to explore. Personally, I am grateful that I have an entire support system who will help me carry my burdens. Thank God for that.
Blessings,
Alyssa
"God has given us our brothers and sisters to stand in Christ's stead and make God's presence and forgiveness real to us."
-Richard Foster, Celebrating the Disciplines, 147
There were a couple of things that hindered me from appreciating confession at the beginning of this class assignment. As a modern day Protestant believer, my idea of what confession is is tainted by the Catholic practice of regular confession. I cannot hear about confession without picturing a Priest behind a wall listening to my anonymous babble. I also have this picture of certain people in my life who have spilled their guts in the wrong company at the wrong time. I have this gut feeling that confession leads to me knowing too much about a person. It is just too personal. I feel responsible for all of their "stuff," and would rather just carry on minding my own business. Needless to say, my ideas about confession were pretty negative at the start of this week.
However, what I realize now, is that I am just a product of a generation that prefers to keep things easy by keeping things to ourselves. There are a million things that culture has trained me to do in secret. There are another thousand things that are deemed "unfit to discuss" in and out side the Church. I have learned that it's okay to leave some things unsaid. It's okay to repent of our sins, but leave it just between us and God. It's okay to never admit we made a mistake. It is okay, because Jesus died for our sins and all is forgiven. There are so many things that I was taught in my own Bible-believing church about the forgiveness of sins and how to repent. The only problem is, most of them were a lie.
Confession is an important component of the Christian life. The truth is, the power of Jesus on the cross and the resurrection should lead us to disgust of our own sin. We should be entirely striving to live a cleansed life because we are only made alive by Jesus' saving work. A natural result of our salvation should be a turning away from a sinful life into a life that reflects that of Jesus. We need to be appreciative and grateful for the chance at being a part of God's kingdom, guilt-free. But how am I going to do that when I am so comfortable with hiding sin and pretending it isn't there? The reality here is that our American Church has lost the communal piece that fits into our sanctification. If I know I am a sinner, which I am, then I should be confessing that before God. And I do. But I also need to be letting people in on what is going on inside of my heart. A thriving Christian community is one that accepts, supports, and encourages. God created us to live in community with one another, in order that we utilize each other when human nature takes control. God calls us to confess our sins with one another so that we can heal and grow. There is transformitive power in admitting sin and faults to another person and hear them utter the words, "Jesus forgives you." Have you ever actually heard someone speak that Truth to you? I haven't, but imagine how empowering that would feel. God calls us to do that for each other. We can receive confession and forgive it in Jesus' name (Foster, 147). Confession is the road that is going to lead to healing. And healing, broken sinners is the sign of a healthy Christian community that understands the true power of Jesus dying for our sins.
Some things that I am going to take away from this discipline have a lot to do with this Living and Learning community I am a part of (See blog post one). First, I will be sure to offer forgiveness in Jesus' name to whoever tells me anything. I think that is something that carries a lot of meaning and can provide a lot of relief for someone who just wants to get something off their chest. I also want to cultivate an atmosphere of Confession among the nine of in this Community. We are in the perfect position to practice what it means to rely on brothers and sisters when we just cannot overcome a temptation. This will be practice for me to carry on throughout my whole life after I give it a try this week. Obviously, I am on a journey to what mature, viable confession looks like, but it is definitely something I am now more willing to explore. Personally, I am grateful that I have an entire support system who will help me carry my burdens. Thank God for that.
Blessings,
Alyssa
"God has given us our brothers and sisters to stand in Christ's stead and make God's presence and forgiveness real to us."
-Richard Foster, Celebrating the Disciplines, 147
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